Monday, April 7, 2008

Crapfiti

This weekend as I was walking the dog around the south side units, I passed through this alley that separates two street-facing buildings.

Walking past the first bamboo planter, I was shocked to see that someone had once again used our community as a public restroom. What's even worse is that culprit squatted against the unit, and as they squeezed out the runny deuce, it created a cascade that scuttled down the stucco.

Taggers take note: If you want to leave your mark and get the attention of everyone, don't do it with markers, etchers or paint, do it with feces.

For some reason, this alley seems to attract the weirdos. In my less than two years of living here, I've: removed graffiti from these service doors numerous times, seen several homeless people sleep between the planters, caught teenage kids smoking weed, asked mothers to not tell their kids it is okay to pee in the alley as they take a break from walking home, and of course, been screamed at by the Poo Lady twice in this very alley.

Never a dull day in the city of Santa Ana.

Got a strong stomach? Click on the image -><- to see the work of the "Ass Bandit".

16 comments :

Spencer Hoo said...

thanks, you just ruined my dinner.




j/k

-SH

Anonymous said...

Would additional lighting over this favored spot help?
Maybe something with a motion sensor?

DakotaSoda said...

eww.

Mayor Miguel Pulido said...

I do it to everyone in this city.
Some symbolically, some in person.
Consider it my gift to you.
Remember: Vote Pulido 2008.

Anonymous said...

dude... if I see any of that going on around our community, I will pick up the hardest thing I see and nail the crapper in the head... I want to see them running with their pants down...

jason said...

to add some more detail to the story... there was no napkins or toilet paper left around the miss... someones got some serious skid marks on their underwear

Ben Dayhoe said...

Additional lighting wouldn't do much for the daytime freaks, but good idea.

Thanks for stopping by Mr. Mayor. Your words are always so genuine.

Anonymous, I'll leave the crapper-shooing to you :)

Jason, if someone is crapping in a public breezeway, I'm betting streak marks are the least of their problems. Good observation tho. Poo Lady at least uses Quizno napkins. The mystery continues...

Anonymous said...

Well, instead of paying for lighting, why not just put in a toilet? Then everybody happy.

Zap Branighan said...

Ooohhh crap my eyes are watering from laughter. Someone should make a TV show about Santiago Street Lofts. It would be like Melrose Place, but more ghetto and funnier.

slaymetender said...

I have a friend that swears by motion activated night vision cameras. Here's a link. He's prodding me to get them for my loft.

http://www.ezwatchstore.com/shop/4-Camera-Security-Kit-Business-Grade-p-16140.html

Barry

Anonymous said...

im moving into the lofts in a few months, but now i'm scared of all the random feces. is it actually a problem, or are you just trying to fill up a blog?

Ben Dayhoe said...

Filler–isn't that essentially what all blogs are? :P

My friend, if the thought of random feces freaks you out, then maybe you might want to reconsider the move here.

Not sure if you are new to the blog, but go back and read some of the other 'bad' and 'ugly' things that have happened here. Keep in mind, the 'good' will always outweigh the 'bad/ugly'. But random crap is the least of my worries. I actually think it's hilarious.

15 years ago, this place was heroin central.

10 years from now...well, you'll have to stay tuned for my next post :)

Anonymous said...

To: anonymous that is scared of the random feces

I live at the lofts, and I'll just say, it's definitely different. Random feces is gross, but I wouldn't say it's scary (unless you're the culprit). Before moving to Santa Ana, I had my typical notions of the city. Gangs, tagging, dangerous. Are there certain areas like that? Yes. Are the lofts like that? Yes, and no. It's not nearly as scary or dirty as it's made out to be. Yeah, this isn't Irvine, but really, if that's what anyone's expecting, then they need to move to...Irvine! For the most part, living here is fun and quiet. All the people that live here are really nice (did you check out the post about the neighborhood bbq?).

I don't think this blog is intended to discourage anyone from moving here. Rather, it's just presenting what happens here. The good and the bad. It's understandable to only focus on the negative, but be aware that in any community, it's really the people living there that make all the difference. Is the feces going to make me wanna move? Nope, cause the people I've met here more than makes up for any of the bad stuff.

And on a final note, congratulations for deciding to move here! Seriously, you won't regret it.

Ben Dayhoe said...

Well said.
And to the previous poster, please don't take my comments as not welcoming you to the hood.

The fact that you've taken the time to read this sh!tty blog and did your homework shows that you are more alert than most–and that is what we need from the new folks moving here.

We can also use more folks who know when sh!t is going down, or when sh!t hits the wall, or someone to cheer us up after we've been sh!tted on :P

Welcome to the hood!

Robert said...

Thanks Ben! You made my dinner a little bit more enjoyable! lol Since I was eating a chili dog. Yum!

Ben Dayhoe said...

Here's an excerpt of the service request email sent to Kim Dean, our association representative.

Hey Kim,
The paint on the stucco on the side of 916 Santa Ana Blvd needs a little touch-up paint. When the diarrhea splatter from the unknown ASSailant was removed from the wall, it took some paint along with.

Can you please have your vendor repaint it please?


If this doesn't win the "Funniest Service Request Award", I'm demanding a recount :)